Q: I finally think that I have met someone that I will marry. I first married when I was only 20 years old which was a mistake because I still had a lot of maturing to do. Nonetheless, the marriage lasted for about five years. I am now 34 soon to be 35 and will probably get married sometime next year. I don’t think it would be in good taste to have something large scaled such as a large bridal party (of more than two people) because it will be a second marriage for me. I am also thinking of wearing a nontraditional wedding dress. What is the rule of thumb on these issues???
A: In general, 2nd weddings are a bit smaller than the first, but not always. The biggest factors when planning your wedding are your and your fiancés’ desires and tastes. You will also need to take into consideration your close friends and family. (For example, do either of you have children who should be involved in the wedding ceremony?) The reality is that you are constrained by only by your imagination and your budget. Your first step is to develop your budget. How much can do you have to spend on your wedding? Then you will need to consider if you prefer to have cocktails and a DJ for 75 or a sit-down meal with a quartet for 25. As you know, life is a series of choices and decisions. Once you have your bottom line dollars, the rest will begin to fall into place.
Jodi R. R. Smith is a nationally known etiquette expert and author. She is the president of Mannersmith Etiquette Consulting. You are invited to email her your etiquette emergencies at Salem@Mannersmith.com